Dress for Success...or at least for warmth.

Let it be known that I do not like dresses.

They are uncomfortable & impractical: not good for climbing trees (something I AM likely to do), I'm terrified they will blow up over my head in a distinctly less-classy Marilyn Monroe moment, and they make me feel like a girly girl...which is strange and generally avoided.

But realistically, if I don't wear a dress at the wedding I think the Boy and my mother will tag-team kill me... So I went looking. And looking...and looking...

It turns out the awesome local designer I really like only makes schmancy dresses for stick-thin girls...something that I cannot claim (witness my bitchin' Halloween costume as Joan Holloway from Mad Men!)

But yes, the fact remains that I need a dress, and having gone to my store of choice and tried things on, it looks like it will be a bit of a challenge...

They suggested I take one of their 30s style satin dresses (the very plain ones) and work with someone at the store to add fancy bits. I'm not opposed, but I'm also not very well equipped to design dresses...gah!

I might take a stab at it later this week and post the travesty results.

FORDPOCALYPSE!!!!!

Oh my.

I haven't forgotten about you, my lovely blog... I've just been a wee bit busy lamenting the terrible terrible choices certain Toronto citizens have made.



Yes, they elected Rob Ford. UGH. Rob Ford will be our mayor for 4 yrs, starting Dec 1st. His understanding of the city's finances is juvenile, at best. His transit plan involves colour coding the sidewalks so drivers don't need to read parking signs. Yes, the hallmarks of a man fit to be an ambassador for the city.

I was especially tickled when they voted him in despite him being a: racist, sexist, drunk, homophobic, wife-beating idiot.




Give me a day or two to lick my ego's wounds and chain myself to a bike lane... Then I shall return.

September 25th, 2011

September 25th, 2011 @ The Berkeley Field House!!! Squeeeee!

That's it! That's the date! :D

Now all I need to do is design, plan, and create a wedding...gah!

While we were at the venue signing all the papers they took us through the space to see the added features (curtains, chandeliers, etc). We saw another wedding being set up, and we've already stolen a fantastic idea from them. On their sign-in/name card table they had framed wedding photos of their parents, grandparents, and great grandparents. We've got a lot of those pictures around already, but for some I think we'll have to dig and maybe contact some family members in Sweden...

The venue liaison (Tom) was fantastic and told us to drop by anytime between now and September to look at other weddings for ideas. I mentioned that we wanted to do something with mason jars (lanterns, vases, etc) he told us a recent wedding had strings of mason jar lanterns to light the ceremony tent...ooooo!


Well, here's to a year of stress, planning, and panic attacks! 25/09/11!

Big News!

I promise there will be some big news after 2pm today...! Maybe something with a date in it...? ^_^

Venue'd!

Three ghosts came in the night (I assume) and visited my folks. When they got back from their adventures in the Black Forest, The Boy and I went to pick them up from the airport. Within 5min of getting to the car, they announced that our choice of venue seemed to be the best one...

HOORAY!!!!

We'll be going over the papers at the cottage this weekend (between devouring turkey and pumpkin pie) but barring any crazy contract issues, September 25th, 2011 @ The Berkeley Field House is the date!

They...RETURN!

'tis true. The parental units return this weekend from their forays into the depths of the Black Forest and Champagne country. Me and The Boy have been busy busy busy with injecting their diabetic cats with insulin twice a day...shudder. AND The Boy just got his real estate registration and is now a fully fledged agent with Century 21! (He has be rasslin' with being a grown up...mainly lamenting becoming "The Man".)

So begins the return to wedding planning. The deadline for venue selection has been set to October 11th. Come hell or high water The Boy and I will be booking our venue of choice if another has not been agreed on prior to that date.


No more little white gloves.*

You love the Bavarian Boys.

*Yes, I have been regressing to classic Canadian films of my tween years. You LOVE it.

The fine art of planning with parents.

That's a lie. There is no fine art. It's an awkward and ungainly dance around the actual issues, peppered with insults and misery.

Maybe that's a little dramatic...ah, but who doesn't love drama? Jersey Shore gets 5million viewers a week!

Trying to find a venue has been impossible. Completely, totally, depressingly impossible. Nobody agrees, everyone has different wants, and time is running out. The Boy and I have very few wants:

• Indoor & outdoor space
• Not too fancy (a little rustic)
• In the city, and easily accessible to people without cars (all our friends)

They want:

• Fancy/elegant venue
• Anywhere within the bounds of the GTA...which is rather large

Our list has ballooned with their addition of my parents' friends, pushing us out of the smaller venue options into mid-to-large sized ones. Goodbye budget. Goodbye to 90% of the rustic options. Hello arguments!

They're leaving for a holiday for a few weeks, and we've set a final decision date for a week after they return. Hopefully things will come together and no one will have to call in the homicide squad.

NOM NOM NOM!

Something to Aspire to

For those of you who have never read The Sassy Curmudgeon's blog...for shame! I am about to gift you the greatest curmudgeonly blogger in the world (I particularly recommend her "go fug myself" series).

And today, by chance, she has a wedding related post...with a video of what is arguably the greatest wedding speech I've ever seen.

Sassy Curmudgeon wedding vid

Oh I haz teh jealousies.

Theme'd?

I hate, HATE super girly/feminine things. Pink? Gross. Frills? Ick. Tiara? BLARGH. So we started thinking, how can we do a cool/pretty wedding that appeals to us, and also to my parents...?

Thus began the obsessive trolling of wedding blogs, flickr, etsy, and of course my friends' recent weddings (Pretty Poopie, Melissa). The Boy and I figured the best thing to do was make lists of what we DON'T want...here's a sampling:


Me:
Pink
Frills/lace/pouffy things
Anything super girly (tiara, veil, butterfly release, calla lillies, etc)
Super fancy wedding in a ball room/banquet hall
Big frilly dress/long train
Boring (aka normal) wedding
cash bar
indoor exclusively

The Boy:
No religious elements
Ordinary
Cash bar
No sit down meal
Huge guest list of random people
Bland food


So that was the starting point. Not terribly helpful... Then we thought, 30s! The 1930s were great! Art Deco! Speakeasies! Film noir! Martinis! ...Aaaaand, as the Boy pointed out, the depression and the rise if Hitler...but ASIDE from that, a pretty dandy time period.

From there we started branching out, 1930s style clothes and drinks, but modern food. The idea of a fancy 1930s ball or cocktail party wasn't really doing it for us, so I suggested a speakeasy theme. Somehow that drifted more towards a country barn party. And that's how we ended up with a 1930s socialite country barn speakeasy.


...We'll see how it goes.

Origin Story

So what's a super hero without an origin story? Nothing. Just some batshit crazy dbag in a cape. And while I may wear a cape when drunk enough, I'm no dbag...so here's ours:

-- August 2003 --

The giant blackout had just ended (which sucked, because I really enjoyed seeing the Milky Way in downtown Toronto...), and my best friend and I were first in line to see Evil Dead: The Musical at the Tranzac. (I just want to point out, this was the opening run of the show. Back when it was a bunch of recent grads operating out of a bar in the Annex...hey I get street cred when I've earned it...) This was when the Boy and I first met, except that we didn't talk or fall in love or anything exciting like that.

No, he went to the early show with some friends and caught the subway home, but my friend & I had no fear of the blueline to get us home, so we went to the late show. And we passed at the doors, like zombiefied nerds in the night...

-- September 2004 --

I'm in film school, naturally I decide to be a keener and volunteer at the Toronto Film Fest. Mainly because Midnight Madness is the shit, AND because volunteers used to get to watch the film & get 2 free movie vouchers per shift.

Anyways, I arrive for my shift, and the theatre is a mass of screaming 13yr old girls, all squealing for Orlando Bloom and ignoring Bill Paxton (which was wholly unfair, because Bill Paxton is pretty freakin awesome...). So I end up having to help the control the line, and I end up chatting with this nice guy with red hair (zomg! The Boy!) and a really confused old guy. The line moves and that's that.

-- Several Weeks Later --

I get a job as an extra in George A. Romero's Land of the Dead. This is the highlight of my working life...Still. I go for my costume fitting and this red headed guy in a bright blue sweater and purple plaid pants is getting measured...geez, he looks familiar...


-- October 2004 --

The filming date was pushed back, and now I have to choose between being a zombie or seeing Morrissey....yes my own personal Sophie's Choice. Well, I sacrifice zombie glory and get my Moz on, deeply sad that I will never live on in film as a flesh eating undead monster.

...But then the call comes! October 23rd, Zombie Time!!!

I get to the film set and there is that red headed guy with purple plaid plants from the costume fitting. Weird. A production assistant comes over to me, red head, and other guy...unfortunately they have left our costumes on the other truck, and we need to sit together for the next 45 min while they track down the purple plaid pants etc. Ok, cool. I decide I should probably chat to these guys, but the other guy seems like he may choke on his own tongue and die if he needs to stand and talk, and that vaguely familiar red head is wearing a Teen Girl Squad shirt...I approve red head guy...I approve.

Over the next month we are stuck sitting and chatting during the 16hr work days on set, but he's cool & nice, and likes to judge random strangers' fashion sense with me...this could be a good thing.

-- 2 years Later --

The Boy: "I was going to ask you later, but you seem like you need cheering up...*presents box* will you marry me?
Me: "... You asshole. You're going to make me get all girly and cry..."
The Boy:"Um..."
Me:"YES!"


THE END

P.S.

Reader: "I thought this was a superhero origin story...?"
Me: *fidgets nervously* "Yes...um...see below?"




-- 2 years Later --


Then they both got super powers from radioactive bats and fought crime from a secret lair under the sea. They could talk to fish like Aquaman, and could fly like flying fish...They mainly fought illegal overfishing, and uhhh,  king crabs?

THE END

Something New.

There's not much more new than this. I mean, I've never done this before, and I don't just mean marriage, or planning a wedding... I mean planning an event of any kind...

I think the most involved event I've ever planned was a fundraiser for a film I made. It consisted of using the upstairs of the bar I worked at, and getting a few friends to play music. Not exactly involved, but it nearly killed me.

So here I am, embarking on the planning/execution of a wedding...my wedding...gah. And I'm lost. Really, truly lost. Wedding blogs confuse me, I don't like girly things, I loathe the idea of being a bridezilla, but I want a nice memorable wedding for myself, my family, and of course, the boy. So what to do?

Quickly! To the tubes of the internet!

I hope that I can share my experiences, the ups & downs, and if nothing else, the ridiculous screw ups & rage that are looming on the horizon.

me & the boy.